|
          |
|
Barb’s Cardinal Story At the funeral service for Laurie I shared my cardinal story and it is nothing short of amazing the feedback from that. I want to share it again here to emphasize how God has proved His love for me. Back in 1984 I was pregnant with Laurie, had three other kids, was separated from my husband, Denny, their dad. In desperation, I prayed that God would show me, some how, that He saw me and cared for me. As I prayed that prayer, a brilliant red cardinal flew by. In that moment, I thought, “Okay, God, I will take that for now.” Through the years, a cardinal always somehow appeared when life was tough. The state of Illinois put the cardinal on their license plate, clearly telling me I needed to slow down. When my sister, Lin, died in 1997, maybe ten of us were standing near the pool where she had been accidentally electrocuted two days earlier. I was repeating my “cardinal” story saying I was sad I had not seen one. With that, from the trees nearby, came a pair of cardinals. They flew around us maybe three times. We all looked at one another in disbelief and then, in belief. God was again, clearly, telling me, that even in the death of my sweet sister, Lin, He was in control. Fast-forward to Wednesday, March 2, 2005, before we knew Laurie was missing. Pete gets a call from our daughter-in-law in Texas, Cheryl, who tells him a cardinal has been dive-bombing their windows for a week, making their dog crazy. Cheryl tells Pete that she does not know what is going on, but she is praying for me. We find out that night Laurie is missing. We are frantic and go to the police at 11:30 that night. Returning from our second trip to the police station Thursday morning, I stop on our driveway to take a call from Brian Steck. As we talk, I look up and see a cardinal flying in the trees. I have not seen a cardinal all winter. I tell Brian about the cardinal, crying and KNOW that whatever this journey holds for us, God is in control. The next day, Laurie still missing, the Daily Herald newspaper prints a picture with a beautiful cardinal in the Neighborhood section. Again, I am reminded that God sees me and knows my terror. He loves me no matter what. Eventually we get the debilitating news, Laurie is dead and it was by her  own hand. God, oh God, where are you? The pain, the horror. A call from Willow, can we go to New Community that Wednesday. There has been another tragedy and the church wants to pray for us. We go as a family and sit, finally, in a new spot for us. As the service goes on, I am distracted. The seat in front of me has a coat flopped over it. I can see a pin on the lapel and I reach forward to move it. It is a little snowman, really out of season in March. On the little hat on the snowman is a CARDINAL! In an auditorium that holds 7200 people I have sat in the only place where a little cardinal is visible. God is again telling me, “ Barb, I am here and I see you and I love you!” What a God to do that for me…
Barb Kovacevich March 28, 2005 |